It’s Valentine’s Day and you’ve most likely spent a bit of time (or maybe too much time?) trying to get goodies together for your kiddos school events — individually labeled treats for friends, gifts for teachers, the dreaded making of the Valentine’s Day mailbox…. maybe you’ve stressed over a gift for your spouse or other loved ones.
My question for you though is….
WHAT HAVE YOU RECENTLY DONE TO SHOW YOURSELF SOME LOVE?
As busy moms who spend so much time caring for others, often times we put ourselves on the back burner.
I’m here to remind you today, on this day of love, that SELF-LOVE is the most important type of love.
It is only when we take time for ourselves, nourish ourselves, allow our busy bodies rest, that we are able to have the energy to do pour into the things and people that matter most.
Here are seven simple ways you can show yourself some love today, and work towards showing yourself love every day.
- Go to bed a little bit earlier.
- Sleep is one of the most impactful areas of health, yet often it is the first thing that we allow to slip. Despite being tired all day, both physically and mentally, we will often stay up late to have some “me” time – which may look like cleaning the house and prepping for the next day, binge watching Netflix, mindlessly scrolling, or maybe it’s even squeezing in more work… I know, I’ve been there. In reality, often when we feel like we just need to veg, the best gift we can give ourselves at the end of the day, the thing that will energize is most, is getting more rest. For the next few days, I suggest choosing a consistent bedtime, and sticking to it. Be realistic based on where you’re currently at, and I’d suggest just adjusting your bedtime 15 minutes earlier.
- Speak kindly to yourself.
- Moms are notorious for beating ourselves up and constant self-sabotage. I’m here to tell you, it’s not our fault AND there is something we can do about it. We live in a society with unrealistic expectations, a culture where as women we are groomed to be perfectionists, constantly striving for unrealistic standards, both for our bodies, and for what success means. What are the things you say to yourself daily, that you would never say to your best friend or daughter? Start by becoming aware of your thoughts, and then begin to retrain your brain. When you recognize a self-sabotaging thought, replace it with one of power, one of grace. One that reminds you of your worth. Mindset work is a big piece of the coaching work that I do with my clients.
- Nourish your body.
- How often do you stop to actually recognize how what you put into your body makes you feel? Like my last tip, it starts with self-awareness. Again, we live in a culture of yoyo diets and restriction, could it be that your body actually needs more fuel? Focus on your consuming more water, protein and fresh fruit to start. I am also a huge believer, that planning, is key to success when it comes to our nutrition.
- Take deep breaths.
- Did I remember Johny’s water bottle? I need to reschedule my dentist appointment. Don’t forget to ask Joe about next Friday’s company meeting. Our brain is constantly jumping between the tasks we must complete in all the roles we play as busy moms. We get caught up in hustle culture and the constant go-go-go. When you feel the stress, feel the anxiety creeping in, PAUSE and take three deep breaths. Deep breathing calms your parasympathetic nervous system.
- Move your body daily.
- Intentional movement may be the best medicine for our soul, one of the the best ways we can show our body love. Naturally, human beings are creatures who crave movement. Make a conscious effort to insert more purposeful movement into your day to day. Maybe it’s taking a walk on your lunch break, or parking farther away in the parking lot, or an after dinner dance party with your kids. Despite underlying beliefs of what we may believe movement and exercise needs to be to “count,” all movement is good movement, and I recommend choosing something that you enjoy. I’ve found in my coaching work, many of us need to shift perceptions around what exercise means, especially as we continue to age. Know you are not alone.
- Surround yourself with uplifting people.
- You know what they say, you are an average of the five people you spend the most time with. Humans are naturally social creatures, and despite what our thoughts may be about certain behaviors, often our desire to be socially accepted (something our brain tells us we need) will take over. Make an effort to recognize which people in your circle lift you up, and which ones drain your energy. Spend more time with those who support you, encourage you and who are going to help you take steps towards the person you are working to become.
- Have FUN and do things that bring you joy.
- When we do things we enjoy, when we have fun, the brain releases dopamine which leads to positivity and can help counteract feelings of stress and hopelessness. Often times we get so caught up in the day to day tasks, we fail to leave time for things we enjoy. Sometimes we get so off track, that we get to a point where we don’t even know what brings us joy. I am a firm believer we MUST find ways to make the day to day fun. We must make time for activities/people/events that we enjoy. If you’re not sure what those things are right now in your life, start to get curious. Begin to recognize the small things that can bring fun & joy – a favorite song, a spontaneous outing with your child, a trashy novel. Think back to things you enjoyed pre-kids, brainstorm ideas with a spouse or friend, maybe even try things your kiddos enjoy. Be goofy. Smile more.
Reflecting back,
- Which one of these have you mastered?
- Which one(s) are still challenging for you?
- What would you add to this list?
I’d love for you to share below. <3